Village Jokes / Recent Jokes

The American investment banker was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.

The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took to catch them.
The Mexican replied, "Only a little while."
The American then asked, "Why didn't you stay out longer and catch more fish?"
The Mexican said, "With this I have more than enough to support my family's needs."
The American then asked, "But what do you do with the rest of your time?"
The Mexican fisherman said, "I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take siesta with my wife, Maria, stroll into the village each evening where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos, I have a full and busy life."
The American scoffed, "I am a Harvard MBA and could help you.
You should spend more time more...

One Day, A sardarji went to take an art class. His art teacher gave the assignment that he must paint something. The sardarji did not know what to paint, so the teacher told him to paint that which he felt was the most beautiful thing in the world.

The sardarji thought, Nothing can be more beautiful than my village, so I shall paint that. The sardarji spent all his time working on the painting the next day. He did not eat, sleep, or take a bath.

Finally, he took the painting to his art teacher. His art teacher was amazed at the detail of the picture, but he said, "No, no, there is something missing. Go back to your village and see what you have missed."

The sardarji went back to his village and revised his painting. The next day in class, he returned with the painting. He presented a black canvas to his instructor. His instructor said, "What! You fool!
I said revise not destroy!"

The sardarji said, "Well you more...

Three men were talking to each other:
1st man: "In our village the winters are so cold that people have to put on 10 blankets."
2nd man: "In our village the winters are so cold that people have to put on 20 blankets."
3rd man: "That's nothing. In our village the winters are so cold that cows give ice-cream instead of milk

An Irish priest in a small village near Donegal was fond of the chickens he kept in the hen house back of the parish. He had a cock rooster and about ten hens. One Saturday night the cock rooster went missing and as that was the time he suspected cock fights occurred in the village he decided to do something about it at church the next morning.
At Mass, he asked the congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?"
Almost immediately all the men stood up.
"Dear god, NO NO,", he said. "That wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?"
Almost immediately all the women stood up.
"Almighty Father, NO NO,", he said. "That wasn't what I meant either. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them?"
Almost immediately, half the women stood up.
"NO, NO, NO", he said. "That wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen my cock?"
Immediately all the Nuns stood up...

One day God was hanging out at the Pearly Gates with St. Paul.
"I need to find someone to run for president," he said after a while.
Attentive to his boss' needs, St. Paul started naming off a few qualified candidates.
"Nah, I want that guy," he said pointing to a drunken Texas governor pissing off a balcony.
"You've got to be kidding," said St. Paul, "Not only is he dumber than a box of rocks, he's got drinking and drug problems."
"I don't care," said God, "This is the guy."
Perplexed, St. Paul asked: "What is the problem, Lord, art thou angry with the Americans?"
"No," said God, "I made a bet with the Devil that I could get a village idiot to run for president."
"But won't that work in the Devil's favor, oh Lord?" Paul asked.
"That's all right," said God, "he'll never take Florida."

One day God was hanging out at the Pearly Gates with St. Paul.
"I need to find someone to run for president," he said after a while.
Attentive to his boss' needs, St. Paul started naming off a few
qualified candidates.
"Nah, I want that guy," he said pointing to a drunken Texas governor
pissing off a balcony.
"You've got to be kidding," said St. Paul, "Not only is he dumber than
a box of rocks, he's got drinking and drug problems."
"I don't care," said God, "This is the guy."
Perplexed, St. Paul asked, "What is the problem, Lord, art thou angry
with the Americans?"
"No," said God, "I made a bet with the Devil that I could get a
village idiot to run for president."
"But won't that work in the Devil's favor, oh Lord?" Paul asked.
"That's all right," said God, "he'll never take Florida."

A RIR hen and a village hen met one day. The RIR considering itself superior, asked
the village hen: How does your lady treat you? Very good. My lady is very good. The RIR
how much does she sell your eggs for? The village hen: She sells them for 30 cents each.
The RIR. Ah! my lady sells my eggs for 32 cents. The village hen. Ahio! What's the use
of making one's arse larger for just two cents!