Villagers Jokes / Recent Jokes

A man, forced to live in an Eskimo village, is having a great deal of trouble interacting with the villagers. Finally, he corners one of them and asks why they are ignoring him.
The villager says that he has not been initiated as a man, so he asks what it is he must do in order to be initiated.
"First, you must drink two bottles of Russian Vodka," explains the villager. "You must then enter a cave and kill a polar bear with your bare hands. Finally, to seal your induction into manhood, you must make love with one of our women for eight hours straight."
The man agrees to carry out the requirements.
That night the villagers hold a big party to initiate him. Everyone sits around the fire and they pass him the first bottle of vodka. He drinks the first half of the bottle without too much trouble, but finds the second half a little more difficult. Finally, he finishes it and they hand him the second bottle. Somehow he manages to finish the second bottle more...

There was once a man who was very rich and very miserly at the same time. The villagers disliked him intensely. One day he said to them, "Either you're jealous of me or you don't understand my love of money-God alone knows. But you dislike me; that much I know. When I die, I won't take anything with me. I will leave it all for others. I will make a will, and I will give everything to charity. Then everyone will be happy."

Even then people mocked and laughed at him. The rich man said to them, "What is the matter with you? Can't you wait a few years to see my money go to charity?"

The villagers didn't believe him. He said, "Do you think I'm immortal? I'll die like everyone else, and then my money will go to charities." He couldn't understand why they didn't believe him.

One day he went for a walk. All of a sudden it started raining heavily, so he took shelter under a tree. Under this tree he saw a pig and a cow. The pig and more...

A notorious tiger was on the prowl, terrorizing a village. So the villagers held a high level meeting to put down this tiger menace. A brave Sardarji stood up twisting his moustache and flexing his muscles, "I can tackle this maneater single-handed," he boasted. "Give me a cowhide and remember," he roared, "not a single soul should venture out tonight. Leave the rest to me." Now, disguised as a cow he stood as a bait waiting to ambush the tiger. Hours passed; suddenly the villagers heard someone screaming in great agony. They all dashed to the spot, only to find the Sardarji lying on the ground groaning and bleeding profusely. One of them asked the Sardarji, "What's the matter? Did you manage to kill the Tiger?" Already the villagers had begun shouting, "Sardarji jindabad, Sardarji jindabad."
"Stop, you idiots, traitors," he screamed. "Tell me first whose bull was it, whose bull was loose tonight!"

The Stock Market simply illustrated. .. is there a lesson here?
Once upon a time in a village, a man appeared and announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for Rs10. The villagers seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them.
The man bought thousands at Rs10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort. He further announced that he would now buy at Rs20.
This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again. Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms. The offer rate increased to Rs25 and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey let alone catch it.
The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at Rs50! However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on behalf of him.
In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. more...

There was a tailor in a little village who was known to brutally attack and torture his wife by clobbering her head with a club and stab her with needles. The villagers decided that they should bring the tailor to justice, so they arrested him and took him to the village elders. The elders believed everyone should have a second chance, so they gave the tailor one last chance. They told him," We will give you one last chance for you and your wife to share sorrow and happiness together. If you don't, you will be sent to the gallows to be hanged." The villagers gleefully looked on as the tailor somberly walked home.
The first few weeks went well, but after that, the tailor started clobbering his wife on the head again. When he was brought to the village elders and asked for his alibi, the tailor said," I stayed true to my word, for when I hit my wife on the head, I am full of happiness and she is full of sorrow. When I miss, she is full of happiness and I am full of more...