Wagon Jokes / Recent Jokes

A fireman looked out of the firehouse window and noticed a little boy playing on the sidewalk. He had small ladders hung on the side of his little red wagon, and a garden hose coiled up in it. He was wearing a fireman's hat. He had the wagon tied to his dog, so that the dog could pull the wagon. The fireman thought this was really cute, so he went out and told the little boy what a great looking fire truck he had. As he did, he noticed that the dog was tied to the wagon by his testicles.

The fireman said, "Son, I don't want to tell you how to run your fire company or anything, but I think if you would tie that rope around the dog's neck you would go faster."

"Maybe so," said the little boy, "but then I'd lose my siren!"

After a whirl wind courtship and marriage, the happy couple climb into the carriage
(amid rice sprinkling on them) and the horse trots off taking them to their farm home from the
church.
The horse carried then up and down the foothills towards their homestead. On a
particularly steep hill, the horse stumbled and caused the couple to be uncomfortably jolted in their
seats.
The farmer calmly stopped the horse. Got off the wagon, walked up to the horse,
grabbed it by the harness, looked it in the eyes, and said in a loud voice "that's once".
The farmer got back in the wagon and the horse plodded off. Again they were going
over a particularly difficult portion of the road and the horse stumbled and jolted the couple in the
wagon.
The farmer again got out of the wagon, walked up to the horse, stared it in the eye,
and said "that's
twice". The new wife was perplexed by all this but did not even know how to more...

A man was walking through the park when he noticed Little Johnny, dressed in a fireman's hat and sitting in a red wagon. It looked like the wagon was being pulled slowly by a large German Shepherd. As the man got closer, he noticed that Johnny had a rope tied around the dog's testicles, which probably accounted for why the dog was walking so gingerly.
Smiling, the man said to Johnny, "That's really a nice fire engine you have there. You know, if you tied that rope around your dog's neck, I'll bet he would pull you faster."
"Yeah," replied Johnny, "but then I wouldn't have a siren."

It was the day after Christmas. The pastor of a church was looking
over their Nativity scene when he noticed the baby Jesus was
missing from among the figures.

Immediately he turned and went outside and saw a little boy with
a red wagon, and in the wagon was the figure of the little infant,
Jesus.

So he walked up to the boy and said, "Well, where did you get Him,
my fine friend?"

The little boy replied, "I got him from the church."

"And why did you take him?"

The boy said, "Well, about a week before Christmas, I prayed to
the little Lord Jesus and I told him if he would bring me a red
wagon for Christmas, I would give him the first ride in it."

It seems a farm boy accidentally overturned his wagon-load of corn. The farmer who lived nearby heard the noise.

"Hey Willis!!" the farmer yelled. "Forget your troubles. Come in with us. Then I'll help you get the wagon up."

"That's mighty nice of you, " Willis answered, "but I don't think Pa would like me to."

"Aw, come on," the farmer insisted.

"Well okay," the boy finally agreed, and added, "but Pa won't like it."

After a hearty dinner, Willis thanked his host. "I feel a lot better now, but I know Pa is going to be real upset."

"Don't be foolish! " the neighbor said with a smile. "By the way, where is he?"

"Under the wagon!"

Two cowboys come upon an Indian lying on his stomach with his ear to the ground. One of the cowboys stops and says to the other, "You see that Indian?""Yeah," says the other cowboy."Look," says the first one, "he's listening to the ground. He can hear things for miles in any direction."Just then the Indian looks up. "Covered wagon," he says, "about two miles away. Have two horses, one brown, one white. Man, woman, child, household effects in wagon.""Incredible!" says the cowboy to his friend. "This Indian knows how far away they are, how many horses, what color they are, who is in the wagon, and what is in the wagon. Amazing!"The Indian looks up and says, "Ran over me about a half hour ago."

A sailor in the Navy who had been at sea for a long time was anxious to be reunited with his girlfriend, so he sent her the following message a few days before his ship was due back in port: "I have missed you so much and I cant wait to make love to you. I want you to come down to the pier to meet me, and I want you to bring the station wagon and have a mattress ready in the back so we can do "it" as soon as I step ashore."The young lady who was just as anxious to make love, sent him a reply: "I will get the station wagon ready as you said, but you had better be the first one off that ship, sailor, because I am not checking I. D. cards."