Warriors Jokes

'Twas The Night Before Christmas,
He Lived All Alone,
In A One Bedroom House Made Of
Plaster And Stone.
I Had Come Down The Chimney
With Presents To Give,
And To See Just Who
In This Home Did Live.
I Looked All About,
A Strange Sight I Did See,
No Tinsel, No Presents,
Not Even A Tree.
No Stocking By Mantle,
Just Boots Filled With Sand,
And On The Wall Pictures
Of Far Distant Lands.
ith Medals And Badges,
Awards Of All Kinds,
A Sobering Thought
Came To My Mind.
For This House Was Different,
So Dark And So Dreary,
The Home Of A Warrior,
Now I Could See Clearly.
The Warrior Lay Sleeping,
Silent, Alone,
Curled Up On The Floor
In This One Bedroom Home.
The Face Was So Gentle,
The Room In Such Disorder,
Not How I Pictured
A United States warrior.
Was This The Hero
Of Whom I'd Just Read?
Curled Up On A Poncho,
The Floor more...

A mother and father were in a brutal custody battle over their young son. The judge, frustrated by their arguing, asks the boy if he wants to live with his mom.
"No, she beats me," the little boy said.
The judge asked if he wanted to live with his dad.
"No, he beats me too."
"Then who do you want to live with, son?"
"I want to live with the Warriors."
"The Golden State Warriors? But why?"
"Because they never beat anybody."

The Milwaukee Bucks will face the Golden State Warriors this fall in an exhibition game in China. Both teams are suspicious of the NBA's intentions, since there are no return flights booked.

The eternal porpoises lived in a landlocked lake along the Ivory Coast of Africa. At one time the lake had been connected to the Gulf of Guinea; now the only way they could feed on the baby sea gulls that enabled them to live forever was if the natives of the Ngubi tribe captured them in the gulf and brought them to the lake.
The natives performed this sacred duty for centuries but lately lions had taken to hunting the valley that led from the Ngubi lands to the shore. Thus it became necessary for the natives to spend a great deal of time distilling and manufacturing a sleeping potion which, with tremendous care, the bravest of the Ngubi warriors dispensed via poison dart before making their way through the valley.
Unfortunately, this process put an enormous drain on the treasury of the tribe. Not only was the poison costly to make, but the time the warriors spent putting the lions to sleep should have been used for hunting. Thus, the chief was forced to put a new law on the more...

KABUL (Voice of Sharia) -- Citing worldwide reaction to last week`s terrorist attacks, multi-national terror network Al Qaeda announced Thursday that it would lay off 5, 000 or more holy warriors. The "holy war" concern said the move was necessary because of an expected 20 percent fatwah reduction and cost and complexity of thwarting new airport and immigration security procedures, according to a statement broadcast on Afghanistan`s Voice of Sharia radio.
"This is, without a doubt, the most difficult thing I have had to do in my over two decades as a mujahad," said Al Qaeda mastermind and chief operations officer Osama bin Laden in a letter to employees. He added, "Some of these people are my friends, who have been fighting the infidel by my side since we were living in caves in Afghanistan during the Soviet occupation. We are still living in caves in Afghanistan, but I believe the bottom is forming and we will see a turnaround soon, provided we can meet more...