Weather Jokes / Recent Jokes
Studly young Romeo and his dimwitted college sidekick areperched near the front door of the girls' dorm. Severalplain Janes walk by as the two converse.Then a Sharon Stone look-alike emerges from the dorm andsaunters past. Romeo turns, smiles, and - barely audibly- inquires, "Tickle your ass with a feather?"The young beauty - startled by what she thinks she heard- exclaims "What?!" Without missing a beat, Romeo repeats"Typical nasty weather?" "Oh," she demures, "yes," and goeson her way.More young lovelys walk by and the scene is repeated."Tickle your ass with a feather?" "What?" "Typical nasty weather?"Finally, Romeo delivers his line,"Tickle your ass with a feather?" and his prospect stops, smiles and invites him up to her room.Now the sidekick, alone, having paid close attention, decides to try this remarkable new technique. A likelyprospect comes near. The sidekick leers and blurts more...
After being nearly snowbound for two weeks last winter, a Seattle man departed for his vacation in Miami Beach, where he was to meet his wife the next day at the conclusion of her business trip to Minneapolis. They were looking forward to pleasant weather and a nice time together.
Unfortunately, there was some sort of mix up at the boarding gate, and the man was told he would have to wait for a later flight. He tried to appeal to a supervisor but was told the airline was not responsible for the problem and it would do no good to complain.
Upon arrival at the hotel the next day, he discovered that Miami Beach was having a heat wave, and its weather was almost as uncomfortably hot as Seattle's was cold. The desk clerk gave him a message that his wife would arrive as planned. He could hardly wait to get to the pool area to cool off, and quickly sent his wife an e-mail.
But due to his haste, he made an error in the e-mail address. His message therefore arrived at the home more...
Due to the current financial situation, changes will be made to the Business Travel Standards and Procedures Manual. Effective Monday, the following revised procedures apply:
Lodging
All employees are encouraged to stay with relatives and friends while on business travel. If weather permits, public areas such as parks should be used as temporary lodging sites. Bus terminals, train stations, and office lobbies may provide shelter in periods of inclement weather.
Transportation
Hitchhiking is the preferred mode of travel in lieu of commercial transport. Luminescent safety vests will be issued to all employees prior to their departure on business trips. Bus transportation will be used only when work schedules require such travel. Airline tickets will be authorized in extreme circumstances and the lowest fares will be used. For example, if a meeting is scheduled in Seattle, but the lower fare can be obtained by traveling to Detroit, then travel more...
LOS ANGELES, CA (DPI) - After El Nino brought only moderate rain to the West Coast, the National Weather Service was forced to admit that the much-hyped El Nino was indeed a hoax.
The infamous "radar" depictions of the swirling weather system were no more than infra-red photographs of a flushing toilet uploaded onto satellites by a couple of teenage pranksters.
In the interest of good taste, the NWS would not describe how the teenagers simulated the Boktu Islands being spun around and swallowed up by the ocean, but admit that "maybe someone should have called Boktu before giving the islands Atlantis status."
The NWS confessed that they were surprised people actually listened to their local weather person in the first place, saying, "I mean, look at them for goodness's sake, they're rodeo clowns in suits."
Reported by Dave James
The Daily Probe, December 22, 1997 [email protected]
Why do raindrops like lightning at night?-So they can see where they are going
Probably the last completely accurate weather forecast was when God told Noah there was a one hundred percent chance of precipitation.
How did you find the weather at camp? It was easy. I just went outside - and there it was!