West Jokes / Recent Jokes
What do you call 32 West Virginian women in one room?
A full set of teeth.
A man was driving through West Virginia looking for a place to move to. He saw 2 men sitting on a porch and said, "I'm moving here from thecity, what do you guys do around here?" The men answered, "Go hunt'n, kill things,' n screw". He then asked, "What do you hunt and kill?" The men replied, "Sumt'n ta screw."
A New York family bought a ranch out west where they intended to raise cattle. Friends came to visit and asked if the ranch had a name.
"Well," said the would-be-cattleman. "I wanted to call it the Bar-J, my wife favored the Suzy-Q, one son liked the Flying-W, and the other son wanted the Lazy-Y. So, we're calling it the Bar-J-Suzy-Q-Flying-W-Lazy_Y."
"But, where are all your cattle?"
"None have survived the branding."
You have to admire Kanye West! He is the first black rapper to screw a young white girl then call her the next day to apologize!
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the West Virginia edition of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside West Virginia. If you have one of the West Virginia editions you may need some help understanding the commands. The West Virginia edtion may be recognized by looking at the opening screen. It reads WINDERS 98 with a background picture of General Lee superimposed on a Confederate flag. It is shipped with a Daisy Duke screen saver. Also note:
The Recycle Bin is labeled Outhouse
My Computer is called This Infernal Contraption
Dialup Networking is called Good Ol' Boys
Control Panel is known as the Dern Dashboard
Hard Drive is referred to as Four Wheel Drive
Floppies are them little ole plastic disc thangs.
And instead of an error message, you get a winder covered with a garbage bag and duct tape.
Other features:
OK = ats aww-right
cancel = hail no
reset = awa shoot
yes D shore
no = naaaaa
find = more...
Kanye West called Taylor Swift to apologize for sabotaging her acceptance speech at the VMA's.
Taylor Swift tried to accept his apology but Kanye West interrupted to say that Barack Obama had the best apology acceptance this year when he accepted the apology made by Joe Wilson.
In fact, Kanye added Barack Obama had the best acceptance of an apology ever.
A cattleman from West Texas died & went on to the Great Beyond. As he approached the great gate, he noticed that the terrain was bare with no greenery. He remarked to the gate keeper, "Howdy Saint Peter. Say, this looks just like Texas.""The gatekeeper replied, "First of all, I'm not Saint Peter and second, you really don't know where you are at all, do you ?"