Wild Jokes / Recent Jokes

Laboratory Rabbit Freedom A rabbit one day managed to break free from the laboratory where he had been born and brought up. As he scurried away from the fencing of the compound, he felt grass under his little feet and saw the dawn breaking for the first time in his life.' Wow, this is great,' he thought. It wasn't long before he came to a hedge and, after squeezing under it he saw a wonderful sight lots of other bunny rabbits, all free and nibbling at the lush grass.' Hey,' he called.' I'm a rabbit from the laboratory and I've just escaped. Are you wild rabbits?' Yes. Come and join us,' they cried. Our friend hopped over to them and started eating the grass. It tasted so good.' What else do you wild rabbits do?' he asked.' Well,' one of them said.' You see that field there? It's got carrots growing in it. We dig them up and eat them.' This, he couldn't resist and he spent the next hour eating the most succulent carrots. They were wonderful. Later, he asked them again,' What else do more...

This married couple was on holiday in Pakistan. They were touring around the marketplace looking at the goods and such, when they passed this small sandal shop. From inside they heard a gentleman with a Pakistani accent say, "You, foreigners! Come in. Come into my humble shop." So the married couple walked in. The Pakistani man said to them, "I have some special sandals I think you'd be interested in. They make you wild at sex like a great desert camel." Well, the wife was really interested in buying the sandals after what the man had claimed, but her husband felt he really didn't need them, being the sex god he was. The husband asked the man, "How could sandals make you into a sex freak?" The Pakistani man replied, "Just try them on." Well, the husband, after much badgering from his wife, finally conceded to try them on. As soon as he slipped them onto his feet, he got this wild look in his eyes; something his wife hadn't seen in many years--- more...

There was a man who really took care of his body. He lifted weights and jogged six miles every day. One morning he looked into the mirror, admiring his body, and noticed that he was suntanned all over with the exception of his penis. So he decided to do something about that.

He went to the beach, undressed completely, and buried himself in the sand, except for his penis, which he left sticking out of the sand.

A bit later, two little old ladies came strolling along the beach, one using a cane to help her get along. Upon seeing the thing sticking out of the sand, the lady with the cane began to move the penis around with her cane.

Remarking to the other little old lady, she said, "There really is no justice in the world."

The other little old lady asked, "What do you mean by that?"

The first little old lady replied, "Look at that.

When I was 20, I was curious about it.

When I was 30, I more...

Q. Why did God give men penises?
A. So we'd have at least one way to shut a woman up.
Q. What's the difference between a paycheck and your dick?
A. You don't have to beg a woman to blow your paycheck.
Q. What are the small bumps around a woman's' nipples for?
A. Its Braille for "suck here".
Q. Why do men die before their wives?
A. They want to.
Q. Did you hear about the guy who finally figured out women?
A. He died laughing before he could tell anybody.
Q. Why do women have tits?
A. So men will talk to them.
Q. What's the difference between a woman and a coffin?
A. You come in one and go in the other.
Q. Why do women close their eyes during sex?
A. They can't stand seeing a man have a good time.
Q. What's six inches long and two inches wide and drives women wild?
A. Money.
Q. Why are hurricanes normally named after women?
A. When they come they're wild and wet, but when they go they take your house more...

School DazeIt was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was receiving gifts from her pupils.The florist`s son handed her a gift. She shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Some flowers." "That`s right" the boy said, "but how did you know?""Oh, just a wild guess," she said.The next pupil was the candy shop owner`s daughter.The teacher held her gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of sweets.""That`s right, but how did you know?" asked the girl."Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.The next gift was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop of the leakage with her finger and touched it to her tongue."Is it wine?" she asked."No," the boy replied, with some excitement.The teacher repeated the process, taking a larger drop of the leakage to her more...

Two Texas A&M Aggies were out hunting in Central Texas when they encountered a scantily clad young lass lounging against a tree.
? What y? all boys doing? she inquired.
They (being manly men) responded, ? Well ma? am, we? re huntin? wild game.?
? Well I? m wild, and I? m game!? she replied.
So they shot her.

When Terry woke up in the morning, he had an enormous hangover and couldn't remember anything he did last night.
He picked up his robe from the floor, put it on and noticed something in one of the pockets which turned out to be a bra. "Damn, what the hell happened last night?" he thought.
As he headed towards the bathroom, he found a pair of panties in the other pocket of his robe. "What the hell is going on? Must have been a wild party last night," he thought.
He entered the bathroom, looked in the mirror and immediately noticed a little string hanging out of his mouth. He had but one thought, "Please, God, please let this be a tea bag!"