"10 Reasons why Men should be castrated before puberty" joke
Research shows that the greatest fear held by 93.75% of all men is not death, but castration; Remove that fear at an early age! go fearless into manhood!
Everyone knows that pre-pubic boys have the most beautiful singing voice (*); preserve that beautiful voice forever. Share the wisdom of the Vatican, who kept choirs of castrati for centuries before modern prejudices forbad them.
Have a castrectomy now and save the bother of a vasectomy (and possibly a reverse-vasectomy) later; the sooner and younger it is done, the least cost and embarassment; no need for condoms or the male pill; no danger of venereal diseases and reduced danger of aids.
Eliminate the temptations of extra-marital affairs and flings which can bring nothing but unhappiness in the long run.
You will never, ever, be accused of rape; what can't speak, can't lie.
Have no fears about being called a lousy lover by your wife, girlfriend, boyfriend.
Play vigorous sports such as soccer without fear; you can face a penalty kick WITHOUT putting your hands in front of your crotch. Throw that jockstrap away. Sit on horse, motorcycle, or bicycle saddles for hours without discomfort.
Wear the latest tight casual and sportswear without embarassing your friends.
Small but measurable weight-loss guaranteed.
When your boss accuses you of ballsing everything up, smile sweetly and say "hardly sir".
If you missed out in childhood, it's not too late; get it done now.
(This is not an advertisement but a testimonial: Dr Ike Cutem, 63 Pentonville Road, London, offers a package deal including a free circumcision with each castration.
"What you never had, you'll never miss" - Dr Ike.)
(*) This is why English cathedral choirs have traditionally employed such boys, who are dressed in long frilly robes and made to perform long rituals with older men, also dressed in long frilly robes; This is not technically transvestism - more like transvestmentism.
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