Castration Jokes

A certain college professor was notorious for getting off the topic of the lecture, and on to his favorite subject, the evils of marijuana. Off he went one day into his inventory of horrors:

"Used regularly, pot can cause psychic disorientation, sterility, cancer and castration!"

"Now wait a minute, Professor," interrupted a student. "Castration?!? That's absurd!"

"No young man, it's sadly true," replied the Teacher smugly. "Just suppose your girlfriend gets the munchies!"

In Lillington, NC, a woman was charged with malicious castration for grabbing a man's genitals during a Christmas party fight. This was upgraded from a charge of "benevolent castration" once police realized... there is no such thing.

Research shows that the greatest fear held by 93.75% of all men is not death, but castration; Remove that fear at an early age! go fearless into manhood!
Everyone knows that pre-pubic boys have the most beautiful singing voice (*); preserve that beautiful voice forever. Share the wisdom of the Vatican, who kept choirs of castrati for centuries before modern prejudices forbad them.
Have a castrectomy now and save the bother of a vasectomy (and possibly a reverse-vasectomy) later; the sooner and younger it is done, the least cost and embarassment; no need for condoms or the male pill; no danger of venereal diseases and reduced danger of aids.
Eliminate the temptations of extra-marital affairs and flings which can bring nothing but unhappiness in the long run.
You will never, ever, be accused of rape; what can't speak, can't lie.
Have no fears about being called a lousy lover by your wife, girlfriend, boyfriend.
Play vigorous sports such as soccer without fear; more...