"1) Waiter" joke

1) Waiter: Would you like your coffee black?
Customer: What other colors do you have?
2) My father is so old that when he was in
school, history was called current affairs.
3) Teacher: Now, children, if I saw a man beating a donkey and stopped him, what virtue would I be showing?
Student: Brotherly love.
4) Teacher: Now, Sam, tell me frankly do you say prayers before eating?
Sam: No sir, I don`t have to, my mom is a good cook.
5). Manager: Sorry, but i can`t give u a job. I don`t need much help.
Job Applicant: That`s all right. In fact I`m just the right person in this case. You see, I won`t be of much help anyway!!
6). Dad: Son, what do u want for ur birthday?
Son: Not much dad, Just a radio with a sports car around it.
7). Teacher: Desmond, your composition on "My Dog" is exactly the same as your
brother`s. Did u copy his?
Desmond: No, teacher, it`s the same dog!
8). Diner: I can`t eat such a rotten chicken. Call the manager!
Waiter: It`s no use. He won`t eat it either.
9). Diner: You`ll drive me to my grave!
Waiter: Well, you don`t expect to walk there, do you?
10). Husband: U know, wife, our son got his brain from me.
Wife: I think he did, I`ve still got mine with me!
11). Man: Officer! There`s a bomb in my garden!
Officer: Don`t worry. If no one claims it within three days, you can keep it.
12). Father: Your teacher says she finds it impossible to teach you anything!
Son: That`s why I say she`s no good!