"Actual help center calls" joke
Actual calls to technical supportComputer novices may feel like they`re alone these days, but some of the following calls to IBM`s help center show there are plenty of people out there who still are inching onto the information superhighway.
After a caller gave a technician her PC`s serial number, he scanned a database of registered users and responded, "I see you have an Aptiva" desktop unit. Before he could say another word, the caller shrieked and said she`d be right back. When the customer returned, the technician asked if she was all right. The caller responded: "Had I realized you could see me, I never would have telephoned in my bathrobe."
A customer who had just received a laptop computer asked about the power-saving feature known as "hibernate." Would this hibernate device work in the spring and summer, the caller asked.
Another caller explained she had received a gift of software on 5. 25-inch diskettes, but she had only a 3. 5-inch disk drive on her computer. The technician said she had two options: Get a second disk drive, or use 3. 5-inch diskettes. The customer called back later, now complaining that her disk drive was making a terrible noise. And this despite the fact that she was using a 3. 5-inch diskette, she said. After a bunch of questions, the technician determined the caller had used a pair of scissors to trim the 5. 25-inch diskettes to fit the 3. 5-inch drive.
A caller, perplexed that his new desktop computer--the one that was supposed to do everything short of bringing on world peace - was doing nothing, cried out for help. No problem, the IBM technician said. First, open a "window" to launch a specific program. The conversation continued, and the caller asked a few moments later if it might be all right to close the window. Why, the IBM technician asked. Because, the caller responded, it was getting very chilly.
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