"Apology letter" joke

A School Master from a remote rural area in Bihar was transferred to a new School in Mumbai. He reported for duty two days after the actual date of joining. Consequently he was asked for an explanation in writing. He has replied to that as follows
_________
Deer sur,
If small small mistakes getting inside my letter, I big you pardon, ass I am not a good englis speaker.
This is my fist vijit to Bombai. Stickly speaking, I wanted to joint your school more fastly, but for the following region, too much time lost in getting slipper reservation in three-tyre compartment.
I tolded I has head ache problem due to migration. Still the clerk rejected to give ticket to I and my sun.
I putted a complain on station masterji.
He said I to go to the lady clerk.
At first she also rejected. I then pressed for long time and finally with great difficulty she gave a birth to my sun.
Anyway I thanked the station master also because he was phully responsible for getting birth of my sun.
Ass a hole it was a bhery diphicult experiment in my hole life.
I hope u will look into explain my hole story after, and late me joint first.
I am now ending this fastly. I am a waiter for your responsement.
May God blast you!"
Yours awfully,
yadav