"B.O.O.K." joke
A new aid to rapid-almost magical-learning has made its appearance.
Indications are that if it catches on all the electronic gadgets will
be so much junk.
The new device is known as Built-in Orderly Organized Knowledge. The
makers generally call it by its initials, BOOK(tm).
Many advantages are claimed over the old-style learning and teaching
aids on which most people are brought up nowadays. It has no wires, no
electric circuit to break down. No connection is needed to an electricity
power point. It is made entirely without mechanical parts to go wrong or need
replacement.
Anyone can use BOOK(tm), even children, and it fits comfortably into the
hands. It can be conveniently used sitting in an armchair by the fire.
How does this revoluntionary, unbelievably easy invention work?
Basically BOOK(tm) consists only of a large number of paper sheets.
These may run to hundreds where BOOK(tm) covers a lengthy program of
information. Each sheet bears a number in sequence, so that the sheets
cannot be used in the wrong order.
To make it even easier for the user to keep the sheets in the proper order
they are held firmly in place by a special locking device called a "binding".
Each sheet of paper presents the user with an information sequence in
the form of symbols, which he absorbs optically for automatic registration
on the brain. When one sheet has been assimilated a flick of the finger
turns it
over and further information is found on the other side. By using both sides
of each sheet in this way a great economy is effected, thus reducing both
the size and cost of BOOK(tm). No buttons need to be pressed to move
from one sheet to another, to open or close BOOK(tm), or to start it working.
BOOK(tm) may be taken up at any time and used by merely opening it.
Instantly it is ready for use. Nothing has to be connected up or switched on.
The user may turn at will to any sheet, going backwards or forwards as he
pleases. A sheet is provided near the beginnning as a location finder for
any required information sequence.
A small accessory, available at trifling extra cost, is the BOOK(tm)mark.
This enables the user to pick up his programme where he left off on the
previous learning session. BOOK(tm)mark is versatile and may be used in
any BOOK(tm).
The initial cost varies with the size and subject matter. Already a vast
range of BOOK(tm)s is available, covering every conceivable subject and
adjusted to different levels of aptitude. One BOOK(tm), small enough to be
held in the hands, may contain an entire learning schedule.
Once purchased, BOOK(tm) requires no further upkeep cost; no batteries or
wires are needed, since the motive power, thanks to an ingenious device
patented by the makers, is supplied by the brain of the user.
BOOK(tm)s may be stored on handy shelves and for ease of reference the
program schedule is normally indicated on the back of the binding.
Altogether the Built-in Orderly Organized Knowledge seems to have great
advantages with no drawbacks. We predict a big future for it.
A Boss's response:
BOOK(tm)* does not, in spite of the claims, seem "to have great
advantages with no drawbacks". Soon, it probably won't even be legal.
Consider:
"It can be conveniently used sitting in an armchair by the fire." Being
paper, it might burn in the fire. Probably fire laws in most locations
wouldn't allow its use there. Worse, such a device, which encourages close
proximity of the user to fire, will be outlawed by OSHA's request.
"Each sheet bears a number in sequence, so that the sheets cannot be
used in the wrong order." How quaint; to think that the programmer
(author) would be allowed to turn over such an important task to the user!
"Cannot" is clearly misuse; any user could incorrectly turn to the wrong
page. A proper user interface might correct that, of course, such as
requiring that each sheet be torn off to expose the next. This is a clear
conflict with "T
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