"Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding...." joke

What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.

Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

Ya mama so fat the only thing stopping her from going to Jenny Craig is the door.

Q: whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito?
A:When you slap a mosquito on the head it stops suckin