"Chuck Norris jokes" joke
1. They once had a street called Chuck Norris Ave., but they had to change the name because nobody crosses Chuck Norris and lives.
2. Giraffes were invented when Chuck Norris uppercut a horse.
3. Once, Chuck Norris lost a testicle while engaged in epic battle with Wolverine. It is more well known today as the planet Jupiter. (Chuck Norris won btw)
4. Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil in exchange for his rugged good looks and incredible strength. Chuck Norris then proceeded to roundhouse kick the devil in the face and take his soul back. The devil, realizing the irony in this, admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play cards every Wednesday.
5. Chuck Norris got a perfect 1600 on his SAT by putting "violence" as the answer to every question. Chuck Norris solves all his problems with violence.
6. When Chuck Norris gives you the finger, he is showing you how many seconds you have left to live.
7. Once Chuck Norris saw a news report about a guy who was executed for treason. This pissed him off because Chuck embodies everything American. Chuck promptly killed himself, went down to hell and proceeded to tear the guys face off, and tie it around his waist to use as a loincloth. He then resurrected himself and went to lunch, paying with exact change.
- Yo Mama's so fat, she couldn't fit in a satellite photo.
- Yo Mama's so fat, she's on both sides of the family.
- Yo Mama's so fat, when she fell over, she rocked herself asleep trying to get up again.
- Yo Mama's so fat, when she sat on a dollar bill, blood came more...
In a crowded city at a crowded bus stop, a beautiful blonde was waiting for the bus. She was decked out in a tight leather mini skirt with matching tight leather boots and jacket. As the bus rolled up and it became her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too more...
The atom bomb isn’t real.. It’s just Chuck falling out a plane and punching the ground..