"Crazy Signs" joke

In the front yard of a funeral home, "Drive carefully, we'll wait."
On an electrician's truck, "Let us remove your shorts."
Outside a radiator repair shop, "Best place in town to take a leak."
In a nonsmoking area, " If we see you smoking, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
On a maternity room door, "Push, Push, Push."
On a front door, "Everyone on the premises is a vegetarian except the dog."
At an optometrist's office, "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
On a taxidermist's window, " We really know our stuff."
On a butcher's window, " Let me meat your needs."
On a fence, " Salesmen welcome. Dog food is expensive."
At a car dealership, " The best way to get back on your feet -- miss a car payment."
Outside a muffler shop, " No appointment necessary. We'll hear you coming."
In a dry cleaner's emporium, " Drop your pants here."