"Eggs-cruciating Pain" joke
There was once two farmers who lived next door to each other. One had a hen and each morning would
look in his garden and pick up one of his hen's eggs for breakfast.
One day, as he looked into his garden, he saw that the hen had laid an egg in his neighbor's garden
next door. He was about to go get it when the other farmer quickly picked it up. The first farmer ran
up to the second farmer and told him that the egg belonged to him because he owned the hen. The
second farmer disagreed because the egg, as he pointed out, was laid on his property.
They argued back and forth for a while until finally the first farmer said, "In my family we normally
solve disputes by the following actions: I'll kick you in the groin and see how long it takes you to
get back up, then you kick me in the groin and see how long it takes for me to get up... whoever gets
back up the fastest, takes the egg."
The second farmer agreed to this. The first farmer quickly put his heaviest pair of boots on. He took
a few steps backward, then ran toward the second farmer and kicked as hard as he could, right between
the legs.
The second farmer fell to the ground, clutching his privates and howling in agony for nearly 10
minutes. Eventually, the second farmer stood up, caught his breath and said, "OK, Now it's my turn to
kick you." The first farmer let out a hardy laugh and replied...
. .. that's alright, you can keep the friggin' egg."
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