"Employee Planned Vacation" joke

Jon:

To ensure that you have a good time on your trip to Australia, your team members have planned and developed a special itinerary to fill the time during your leisure hours. Agenda follows:

Day 1: The' 10 Deadliest Snakes' Fall Tour. You and a guest will be escorted through the outback and provided with the opportunity to handle and examine each of the world's 10 most deadly snakes.

Day 2: The' Great White Encounter.' You and your tour guide will take a small boat to the Great Barrier Reef, where you will be able to dive into the chum-laden water and experience the beauty of the Great White shark.

Day 3: The Aboriginal' Festival of Spears.' You will be the honored guest of a small aboriginal village as they celebrate the subjugation of the aboriginal race by the white man, with free liquor and a special weapons exhibition.

Day 4: The' Crocodile Dundee' Petting Zoo. You will be able to come up-close and personal with the occasionally harmless salt-water crocodiles of the Australian coast. Lucky audience members are asked to participate in a croc wrestling exhibition.

Day 5:' Those Marvelous Morays.' This tour will once again return you to the beauty of the Great Barrier Reef, where you will be allowed to hand feed special finger-shaped sausages to the wild eels of Stubby Hand Reef.

We hope you will enjoy your trip!

Your loyal employees.

A young woman goes into the doctor's office for a checkup. As she takes off her blouse, he notices a red "H" on her chest. "How did you get that mark on your chest?" asks the doctor. "Oh, my boyfriend went to Harvard and he's so proud of it that he never more...

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Two cats: Felix & Un-deux-trois, decided to have a race to see who could swim across the river first.Guess who won? Felix! Because Un-deux-trois cat sank.
(Un deux trois quatre cinq)

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Knowledge is knowing a tomato is a fruit; Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.

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Three ministers - a Presbyterian, a Methodist, and a Baptist - and their wives were on a cruise. A tidal wave came up and swamped the ship; they all drowned, and before long, they were standing before St. Peter.

First came the Presbyterian and his wife. St. Peter more...

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2 Scousers are riding along the M62 from Manchester to Liverpool on a motorbike. They break down and start hitching a lift. A friendly trucker stops to see if he can help and the scousers ask him for a lift.
He tells them he has no room in the wagon as he is carrying 20, more...

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Celine :when a white person keeps on looking at you , all you do is tell him straight " you're looking at me, like never seen a aboriginal before!"
Funny Joke? 9 vote(s). 20% are positive. 1 comment(s).