"Excuses To Use When Caught Sleeping At Work" joke
They told me at the blood bank that this might happen. This is just a 15 minute power nap like they raved about in that time management course you sent me to. I was working smarter - not harder. Whew! I must have left the top off the whiteout. I wasn't sleeping! I was meditating on the mission statement and envisioning a new paradigm! This is one of the seven habits of highly effective people! I was testing the keyboard for drool resistance. I'm in the management training program. I'm actually doing a Stress Level Elimination Exercise Plan (SLEEP). I learned at the last mandatory seminar you made me attend. This is in exchange for the six hours last night when I dreamed about work! I was doing a highly specific Yoga exercise to relieve work related stress. Do you discriminate against people who practice Yoga? No! Why did you interrupt me? I had almost figured out a solution to our biggest problem. The coffee machine is broken.... Someone must have put decaf in the wrong pot. Boy, that cold medicine I took last night just won't wear off. Ah, the unique and unpredictable circadian rhythms of the workaholic! I wasn't sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact lens without my hands. The mail courier flipped out and pulled a gun so I was playing dead to avoid getting shot. Geez, I thought you (the boss) were gone for the day. I'm just resting my eyes.
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