"Frank and Matt" joke

Two college students, Frank and Matt, are riding on a New York City subway when a beggar approaches them asking for spare change.
Frank adamantly rejects the man in disgust.
Matt, on the other hand, whips out his wallet, pulls out a couple of singles and gladly hands them over to the beggar with a smile.
The beggar thanks him kindly and then continues on to the other passengers.
Frank is outraged by his friend's act of generosity.
"What on earth did you do that for?" shouts Frank., "You know he's only going to use it on drugs or booze."
Matt replies, "And we weren't?"

Q: What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
A: You can un-screw a lightbulb!

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What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!

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A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads:
Cheese Sandwich: $1.50
Chicken Sandwich: $2.50
Hand Job: $10.00
Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive more...

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