"Help Feed an AA Pilot" joke

It's just not right. Thousands of pilots in our very own country are living at or just below the six
figure salary line. And if that weren't bad enough, many of them may go several weeks or months
without a paycheck if they are forced by American Airlines management to strike. But now you can
help. For about three hundred dollars a day ~ that's less than the price of a 25" television set ~
you can help keep a pilot economically viable during their time of need.
Three hundred dollars a day may not seem like a lot of money to you, but to a pilot, it could mean
the difference between a vacation fishing in Florida or a Mediteranean cruise.
For you, three hundred dollars is nothing more than half a month's rent or mortgage payment. But to a
pilot, three hundred dollars a day will almost replace his or her salary.
Three hundred dollars a day will enable a pilot to upgrade his or her home computer, buy that new
100" television set, trade in the 6 month old Lexus for a Ferrari, or enjoy a dinner (with champagne)
at The Mansion.
"HOW WILL I KNOW I'M HELPING?"
Each month, you will receive a complete financial report on the crew member you sponsor. Detailed
information about his or her stocks, bonds, 401K, and real-estate holdings will be mailed to your home.
You will be able to watch your pilot's net worth grow. You'll also get information on how they chose
to invest their 1. 2 million dollar lump sum they get upon their retirement.
"HOW WILL THEY KNOW I'M HELPING?"
Your pilot will be told that he or she has a SPECIAL FRIEND that just wants to help. Although the
pilot won't know your name, he or she will be able to make collect calls to your home via a special
operator in case they need more funds.
I want to help!! In the event of a strike by the APA, I would like to sponsor the crew member listed
below. I would like to sponsor (circle your selection/s):

___CAPTAIN ___F-100 CREW MEMBER
___AN ENTIRE FLIGHT CREW ___A300 CREW MEMBER
___FIRST OFFICER ___SUPER-80 CREW MEMBER
___NAVIGATOR ___727 CREW MEMBER
___767 CREW MEMBER ___MD-11 CREW MEMBER

___Please apply my donation to the crew member most in need.

Please charge the account listed below $326. 25 per day (or $350. 29 for MD-11 crew members) for the
duration of the strike. Please send me a picture of the crew member I have sponsored, along with a
set of "wings" and my very own "new" red S. C. O. P. E. badge (while supplies last)

[ ] Mastercard [ ] Visa [ ] American Express [ ] Diner's Club
[ ] AAsset Card [ ] Discover Card
Account Number: ________________________________
Expiration Date: _________________________
Signature: ______________________________________
Send Completed Forms to the APA. Or, Enroll By Phone: 1-800-FD-A-PILT.
Note: Sponsors agree not to contact the crew member sponsored or their families in person or by other
means including, but not limited to, phone calls, letters, email, or third parties. Contributions
made are not tax deductible. In the event of no strike action taken, sponsors agree to a one time
administration charge of $500. 00 to cover administration costs of this program.