"How To Deal With Stupid Bosses" joke
How to manage them so you can read this site at work.
When told to do something that can't be done... argue a bit, then go play solitaire for awhile. After about 2 or 3 hours, come back and say "I tried... sorry, it can't be done." Usually this will satisfy their insistence on their ideas at least be tried.
Don't provide solutions, just more and more issues and questions.
Do EXACTLY what they tell you. This works well for bosses who have no idea what's going on and only use vague statements. You can't get in trouble for doing what they say...
Make references to the nice weather and how you should would like to be out there golfing. Eventually they will grow tired of hearing you and go play golf.
When your boss comes near you, start to sniffle or cough... and be sure to warn them that you 'might be getting that nasty cold that so and so has had for the last month.' I have found that this quickly sends bosses hiding for cover in their office.
Send formal proposals for everything including making coffee, and all other miniscule tasks. Be sure to discuss them frequently with your boss, and they will learn to avoid you.
Create things like safety checklists and perform them often. Claim the safety department requires it... or better yet... it's a QS requirement.
On really nice days, keep bringing up unsolvable issues and problems until they get 'stressed' and go play golf.
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