"How to speak Southern" joke
WORLD FAMOUS SOUTHERN TALKBECOME A NATIVE SOUTHERNERHow to talk native SOUTHERN in one easy lessonAig - What a hen laysAints - He's got aints in his paintsPaints - What cha put on your laigs of a morninArn - Ma's tard of arninBag - He bagged her to marry himBobbed - A bobbed wire fenceBresh - He had a bresh with the law, and the law won.Bub - the light bub burned outCheer - What you set inCrick - A small streamClum - He sure clum that tree fastern any 'coonChiny - country over in AsiaChuch duds - Sunday go-to-meetin clothesCore - He got hisself a new Ford coreCyow - Animal on FarmDeppity - He helps out the shurfDribbed - He dribbed milk on his shirtDainz - Satidy night socialEllum - A graceful treeFanger - What you put your rang onFaince - Whats round the hawg lotFar - What get the brandin arn hotFurred - He got furred from his jobFlar - A rose is a purdy flarFrash - Them aigs ain't frashFuriners - All non-'bamansFurther - Hits ten miles further to townGrain - She was grain with envyHail - Where bad folks goHep - Poor George, he can't hep it, he was born with a silver spoon in his mouth.Hern - It aint hern, it's his'nHilbilly - People in the next countyHollar - Whats between the hillsHard - Got a brend new hardhand Tar - His core blew a tarLaymun - A sour fruitLaig - Most folks have two of themLather - What you climb upLiberry - Where you go to check out books for larnin Mailk - what you get from cyowsMere - What you see your self inMinners - Live baitMisrus - Married WomanNar - Opposite of wideNayk - Your head sets on itNup - NoOrrel - Them hinges need orrelOrmy - What the sojers go inPank - A light red colorParch - Sit out on the parch and watch the grass growPetition - What separate the roomsPoke - A paper bag or sackPokey - What the shurf and deppity puts crimnals in PokeSalit - A green vegetablePuppet - What the preacher is inPurdy - She is purdy as a pitcherPurt near - Almost; he purt near caught that greased pigRang - You wear it on your fangerRut - That there tree sure has long rutsRah cheer - I was born rah cheer in townRainch - A big cow farmRat - Do it rat now! Rench - Rench the soap yourselfRoont - She plum roont her shoesSalary - A stringy vegetableSoardeens - Small canned fishShar - A light rainGully Worsher - A medium heavy rainToad strangler - A heavy rain SodyPop - A soft drinkSprang - Water out'n the groundShurf - The Shurf put Clem in jailStorch - This here aprn has to much storch in itSkeered - that plumb skeered me to deathThanks - He shore thanks he's smartTho - Tho me the ballThoat - I shore got a sore thoatWar - A bobbed war fanceWorsh - Go worsh your faceWarter - What you worsh your face inYurp - A continent overseas
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