"How's your eyesight?" joke
"Yes," said Sam, "I saw him plainly take the goods."
The lawyer asked Sam again, "Sam, this happened at night. Are you sure you saw my client commit this crime?"
"Yes" said Sam, "I saw him do it."
Then the lawyer said, "Sam, listen, you are 80 years oldand your eyesight is probably pretty bad. Just how far can you see at night?"
Sam quickly replied, "I can see the moon, how far is that?"
A middle-aged woman looks in the mirror.
"God, I look old, fat and ugly," she says to her hubby. "Pay me a compliment, dear."
Her hubby says, "Your fucking eyesight's good!"
"How was your golf game, dear?" asked Jack's wife Tracy.
"Well, I was hitting pretty well, but my eyesight's gotten so bad I couldn't see where the ball went."
"But you're seventy-five years old, Jack!" admonished his wife, "Why don't more...