"Jack Benny anecdote" joke
Jack Benny was for about 50 years one of the USA's favorite comedians. One of his gimmicks was to play the violin badly (the audience would boo and laugh).
Jack Benny tells of the time he carried his violin case to the White House to perform for President Eisenhower. A guard stopped him and asked, "What's in that case?"
To be funny, Benny replied, "A machine-gun."
"Thank goodness," deadpanned the guard, "I was afraid it was your violin!"
An American businessman was at the pier of a small coastal Mexican village when a small boat with just one fisherman docked. Inside the small boat were several large yellow fin tuna.
The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish and asked how long it took more...
A couple of hunters are out in the woods when one of them falls to the ground. He doesn't seem to be breathing, his eyes are rolled back in his head. The other guy whips out his cell phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can more...
Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor, and dishwashing liquid made
with real lemons?
After many years, a young Jewish Talmud student who had left the old country for America returns to visit the family.
"But-where is your beard?" asks his mother upon seeing him.
"Mama," he replies, "in America, nobody wears a more...