"Long list of annoyances!" joke

*** Things that can and do bother the "normal" person. ***
Having to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic thingy in the middle of them.
The person behind you in the supermarket runs his cart into the back of your ankle. The same person that gives you a "blank stare" when you look at them.
There's always a car riding your tail when you're slowing down to find an address.
You open a can of soup and the lid falls in.
It's bad enough that you step in dog poop, but you don't realize it till you walk across your living room rug. Especailly since you don't even have a dog!
There's a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING.
You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.
Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the mirror and
discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth.
You drink from a soda can into which someone has extinguished a cigarette.
You slice your tongue licking an envelope...OUCH!
Your tire gauge lets out half the air while you're trying to get a reading.
You wash a garment with one tiny tissue in the pocket, and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.
A piece of foil candy wrapper makes electrical contact with your filling...DOUBLE OUCH!
People behind you on a supermarket line dash ahead of you to a counter just opening up.
You can't look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don't know how to spell it!
You have to inform five different sales people in the same store that you're just browsing.
You reach under the table to pick something off the floor and smash your head on the way up.