"Men Are Like....." joke

Men are like department stores.... their clothes should always be half off. Men are like vacations.... they never seem to be long enough. Men are like computers... hard to figure out and never have enough memory. Men are like coolers... load them with beer and you can take them anywhere. Men are like chocolate bars.... sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips. Men are like coffee.... the best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long. Men are like horoscopes.... they always tell you what to do and are usually wrong. Men are like plungers... they spend most of their lives in a hard ware store or the bathroom. Men are like cement.... after getting laid, they take a long time to get hard. Men are like..... placemats
they only show up when there's food on the table. Men are like..... mascara
they usually run at the first sign of emotion. Men are like..... bike helmets
they're good in emergencies but usually just look silly. Men are like..... government bonds
they take so long to mature. Men are like..... copiers
you need them in reproduction but that's about it. Men are like..... lava lamps
fun to look at it but not all that bright. Men are like..... bank accounts
without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest. Men are like..... high heels
they're easy to walk on once you get the hang of it. Men are like..... curling irons
they're always hot and always in your hair. Men are like..... mini skirts
if your not careful they'll creep up your legs. Men are like..... handguns
keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it.