"New Yorker item" joke
The following is an approximation of an item in the New Yorker (the
kind that appear at the ends of articles in the back) that refers to a
correction printed by some newspaper I don't remember. (I read it in
a dentist's office and don't have it in front of me now.)
"Dear Abby said yesterday that one cure for hiccups is to use carbon
monoxide. The correct treatment uses carbon dioxide."
The New Yorker's comment? "Too late."
Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
Q: What's the difference between a pregnant woman and a lightbulb?
A: You can un-screw a lightbulb!
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.
Person 1: Knock, Knock
Person 2: Who's there?
Person 1: Cows go.
Person 2: Cows go who?
Person 1: No, silly! Cows go moo!