"Ode to Valentine's Day" joke
Hearts and roses and kisses galore...
What the hell is that schtuff for
People get mushy and start acting queer
It's definitely the most annoying day of the year.
This day needs to get the hell over with and pass.
Before I shove a dozen roses up Cupid's ass.
I'll spend the day so drunk I can't speak
And wear all black for the rest of the week.
Guys act all sweet but soon it will fade?
For all they are doing is trying to get laid.
The arrow cupid shot at me must not have hit,
Because I think love is a bunch of $#!+.
So there's my story... what can I say?
Love bites ass... SCREW VALENTINE'S DAY!
A mother had 3 virgin daughters. They were all getting married within a short time period. Because Mom was a bit worried about how their sex life would get started, she made them all promise to send a postcard from the honeymoon with a few words on how marital sex felt.
The more...
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.
Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!