"Oh crap! a Lexus" joke
A lady walks into a Lexus dealership. She browses around, then spots the perfect car and walks over to inspect it. As she bends to feel the fine leather upholstery, she farts loudly.
Very embarrassed, she looks around nervously to see if anyone has noticed her little accident and hopes a sales person doesn't pop up right now. As she turns back, there, standing next to her is a salesman.
"Good day, madam. How may we help you today?" Very uncomfortably she asks, "Sir, what is the price of this lovely vehicle?" He answers, "Madam, if you farted just touching it, you are very likely going to crap when you hear the price."
A guy steps into an elevator and there's just one attractive woman in it.
He turns around to push the button for his floor and his elbow bumps right into her breast.
He says, "Oh, I'm so sorry. If your heart is as soft as your breast, I hope you'll be able to more...
A mother had 3 virgin daughters. They were all getting married within a short time period. Because Mom was a bit worried about how their sex life would get started, she made them all promise to send a postcard from the honeymoon with a few words on how marital sex felt.
The more...
A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...
What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.