"Paint the Porch" joke
Hobo shows up at the front door of a grand mansion. The owner comes to the door. Hobo says, "Sir, I am down on my luck and ask if you could please spare me a meal?"
The owner stared at the hobo for a minute and then broke out in a lambasting such as the world has never heard. "You shiftless bum! I worked all my life for what I have and you make me sick, begging for food! How dare you! You should be ashamed!"
The hobo lowered his head in shame. After a minute of silence, the owner began to soften toward the unfortunate man, and said, "Look, if you are willing to do some work for me, I will pay you and give you a meal."
The hobo was ecstatic! "Oh, yes sir! I will do whatever you want. Thank you!" So the owner said, "OK, go around back. You'll see a porch there, and a bucket of battleship grey paint and a brush. Paint the porch, windows included, and you'll have a meal." The hobo wasted no time and scurried around back.
About an hour later, the front bell rang again. The owner opened the door and saw a paint splattered hobo with a big grin on his face. "Now don't you feel better," he said. "Yes!" said the hobo. "I'm a new man!"
"OK," said the owner, "come in and have some lunch." The two sat around the kitchen eating and drinking for about an hour, when the hobo said he had to leave. He thanked the owner profusely for getting him back on the straight and narrow.
As the owner showed the hobo to the front door, the hobo turned and said, "Oh, by the way, that wasn't a Porsche out back, it was a Ferrari."
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