"Pilot says" joke

Pilot says: "Folks, we have reached our cruising altitude now, so I am going to switch the seat belt sign off. Feel free to move about as you wish, but please stay inside the plane till we land... its a bit cold outside, and if you walk on the wings it affects the flight pattern."

A woman's breasts are like a child's toys. They are meant for the child - but the husband is the one that usually ends up playing with them.

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Your Mamma's so fat, when she went bungee jumping, she broke the bridge!

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Q: What's the worst trick you can do to your blind brother?
A: Leave the plunger in the toilet

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A guy steps into an elevator and there's just one attractive woman in it.
He turns around to push the button for his floor and his elbow bumps right into her breast.
He says, "Oh, I'm so sorry. If your heart is as soft as your breast, I hope you'll be able to more...

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There's a Space Shuttle mission to the moon with 2 monkeys and a woman on board.

The headquarters in the US calls:"Monkey #1, Monkey #1 report to comms for instructions."
He sits down and he is told to release the pressure in compartment 1, increase the more...

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