"Polak At Guillotine" joke
An Italian, an American, and a Polak were captured by the French for various crimes and are taken to the Guillotine.The executioner places the Italian on the block and asks if he has any last words. The Italian replies, "I pray to the Virgin Mary that I may live." They drop the blade it it stops a mere inch above the Italian's neck. Amazed, the French let him go.Next, the American is put in position and asked if he has any final words. He replies, "In the name of Jesus Christ, please have mercy." They drop the blade, and again it stops just an inch from the American's neck. In disbelief, they let him go free.Then the Polak is placed on the block, and they ask if he has any last words.He says, "Yeah. You've got a knot in your rope."
A 12-year-old boy comes up to the Polak and says, "I was looking in your bedroom window last night and I saw your wife giving you a blow job. Nyah, nyah, nyah."The Polak answers, "The joke's on you, Johnny. Nyah, nyah, nyah-I wasn't even home last night!"
A Polak wanted to join an amateur baseball team. The coach looked him over and decided to give him a chance.
"I will give you three questions," said the coach. "If you come back in a week and answer them all correctly, you're on the team."
"Fair more...
A Polak went to a carpenter and said, "Can you build me a box that
is two inches high, two inches wide, and fifty feet long?"
"Hmm..." mused the carpenter. "It could be done, I suppose, but what
would you want a box like that more...
It was in the mid of the seventh century. Before going on a cruisade the Count put on a special kind of moral-belt on his wife. It had a built-in guillotine that automatically would neutralize anything wanting to get into "the noble part" of her.
Three years later, more...
A swede, a norwegian and a dane were arrested in France during the french revolution. They each got to choose which way they would die. The norwegian chose the guillotine, because he saw it as the latest fashion. His head went under, but the blade stopped 1 inch from his neck. more...