"Political humor!!!" joke

POLITICIAN - A person who divides all available time between running for office and running for cover.
From: Lela Lowe - [email protected]
Jay Leno: "This is a rough election year.... Huffington's illegal nanny has started running negative ads against Feinstein's illegal nanny"
("Tonight," NBC, 11/4).
David Letterman: "Big election on Tuesday and that means just about now Ted Kennedy should be auditioning strippers for the victory party."
("Late Show," CBS, 11/4).
David Letterman, on the "ugly" campaign: "You look at some of these races around the country and you think it's just a damn shame somebody has to win."
Letterman: "President Clinton is the only president we've ever had who when someone holds up a baby, he doesn't know whether to kiss it or deny knowing the mother"
("Late Show," CBS, 11/7).
Jay Leno, on Huffington calling Sens. Barbara Boxer and Dianne Feinstein the "Thelma and Louise" of CA politics: "That's got to be tough being attacked by the Forrest Gump of American politics."
Leno: "You can tell the candidates are getting desperate in the last hours of the campaign. Yesterday, Ollie North stopped lying and Chuck Robb slept with his own wife"
("Tonight," NBC, 11/7).
Conan O'Brien, on George Foreman knocking out Michael Moorer: "It's amazing that a guy in his mid-forties, who can't stop eating cheeseburgers is that powerful. I mean, besides President Clinton"
("Late Night," NBC, 11/7).
From: Orlando "Doc" Griego - [email protected]