"Ponderings collection 26" joke

I couldn't repair my brakes, so I made the horn louder.

Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

How do you tell when you run out of invisible ink?

What happens if you get scared half-to-death twice?

If I worked as much as others, I would do as little as they.

When I'm not in my right mind, my left mind gets pretty crowded.

I intend to live forever -- so far, so good!

Dancing is a perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire.

Ambition is a poor excuse for not having enough sense to be lazy.

Eagles may soar, but weasels don't get sucked into jet engines.

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