"Products we could do without!" joke
Fingernail Clippers: That's why we have teeth. Makeup That is Tattooed on: You might love that green eyeliner now, but what about when you're fifty? Colored Elastics For Braces: As if the braces didn't make your mouth stand out enough. Inflatable Furniture: Nothing boosts the ego more than sitting on a couch and popping it. Crayons That Smell: Oh, good, let's give kids another reason to eat them. Fake Eyelashes: You shouldn't be able to braid your eyelashes. The Epilady: Pulling hair out by the roots is masochistic. Those Crocheted Kleenex Box Covers: Kleenex does not get chilly. Rubber Clothing: Because you shouldn't bounce if you fall down the stairs. Doggie Sweaters: Fido is not Mr. Rogers, nor does he want to be Mr. Rogers. Thong underwear: Nothing leads to insanity faster than a perpetual wedgie.
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