"Repairman" joke

A woman is having a problem with her closet door, it was falling off every time a bus was passing by.
So she called a repair man.
The repairman comes and sees that indeed, the door falls off every time a bus passes by.
"OK, I'm going to see what is going on, just close the door behind me" and he steps into the closet.
Just then, the husband comes from work, opens the closet and finds the repairman.
Husband: "What the hell are you doing here!"
Repairman: "Well, you're not going to believe it, but I'm waiting for a bus!"

I'm hungry:

"I could eat the crotch out of a dead leper's undies."
"I could eat the horse and chase the jockey."
"So hungry I'd eat a shit sandwich, only I don't like bread."
"I could eat the arse out of a rag doll more...

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A very attractive lady goes up to a bar in a quiet rural pub. She gestures alluringly to the bartender who comes over immediately. When he arrives, she seductively signals that he should bring his face closer to hers. When he does, she begins to gently caress his full more...

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What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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Q: What is the similarity between a rubix cube and a dick?
A: The more you play with them, the harder they get!

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