"Revising the Declaration of Independence" joke

The Court of King George III
London, England July 10, 1776 Mr. Thomas Jefferson
c/o The Continental Congress
Philadelphia, Pennsylvania Dear Mr. Jefferson: We have read your "Declaration of Independence" with great interest. Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking, and many of your statements do merit serious consideration. Unfortunately, the Declaration as a whole fails to meet recently adopted specifications for proposals to the Crown, so we must return the document to you for further refinement. The questions which follow might assist you in your process of revision: In your opening paragraph you use the phrase "the Laws of Nature and Nature's God." What are these laws? In what way are they the criteriaon which you base your central arguments? Please document with citations from the recent literature. In the same paragraph you refer to the "opinions of mankind." Whose polling data are you using? Without specific evidence, it seems to us the "opinions of mankind" are a matter of opinion. You hold certain truths to be "self-evident."Could you please elaborate. If they are as evident as you claim then it should not be difficult for you to locate the appropriate supporting statistics. "Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" seem to be the goals of your proposal. These are not measurable goals. If you were to say that "among these is the ability to sustain an average life expectancy in six of the 13 colonies of at least 55 years, and to enable newspapers in the colonies to print news without outside interference, and to raise the average income of the colonists by 10 percent in the next 10 years," these could be measurable goals. Please clarify. You state that "Whenever any Form of Government becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute a new Government...." Have you weighed this assertion against all the alternatives? What are th

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