"Sheeda & Bush in War" joke
George Bush was sitting in his office wondering whom to invade next when his telephone rang.
"Hallo, Mr. Bush!" a heavily accented voice said. "This is Sheeda from
Chuk no -3, District Gujrat, Pakistan. I am ringing to inform you that we are officially declaring war on you!"
"Well, Sheeda," Bush replied, "This is indeed important news! How big is
your army?"
"Right now," said Sheeda, after a moment `s calculation, "there is
myself, my cousin Basheera, my next door neighbor Karam Deen, and the entire kabaddi team from the village. That makes eight"
Bush paused. "I must tell you, Sheeda that I have one million men in my
army waiting to move on my command."
"BLOODY Hell " said Sheeda. "I `ll have to ring you back!"
Sure enough, the next day, Sheeda called again.
"Mr. Bush, it is Sheeda, I `m calling from Chuk no-3 Gujrat, the war is
still on! We have managed to acquire some infantry equipment!"
"And what equipment would that be, Sheeda?" Bush asked.
"Well, we have two combines, a donkey and Amjad `s tractor."
Bush sighed. "I must tell you, Sheeda, that I have 16, 000 tanks and
14, 000 armored personnel carriers. Also, I `ve increased my army to 1-1/2
million since we last spoke."
"Oh teri (oops)....." said Sheeda. "I `ll have to get back to you."
Sure enough Sheeda rang again the next day. "Mr. Bush, the war is still
on! We have managed to get ourselves airborne. ..... We `ve modified
Amjads `s tractor by adding a couple of shotguns, sticking on some wings and the pind `s generator. Four boys from Sahiwal have joined us as well!"
Bush was silent for a minute and then cleared his throat. "I must tell
you, Sheeda, that I have 10, 000 bombers and 20, 000 fighter planes. My
military complex is surrounded by laser-guided, surface-to-air missile
sites. And since we last spoke, I `ve increased my army to TWO MILLION!"
"Tera pala hove. ..." said Sheeda, "I `ll have to ring you back."
Sure enough, Sheeda called again the next day. "Mr. Bush! I am sorry to
tell you that we have had to call off the war."
"I `m sorry to hear that," said Bush. "Why the sudden change of heart?"
"Well," said Sheeda, "we `ve all had a long chat over a couple of days
and decided there `s no way we can feed two million prisoners!!."
Not enough votes...