"The 9 Types of Boyfriends" joke

Joe Sensitive - "After I wash the dishes, let's cuddle, OK?"Also known as: Mr. Nice Guy, Family man, Honey, Darling, SnugglepupAdvantages: Well-behaved; irons own shirtsDisadvantages: Irritatingly compassionate, wimpyOld Man Grump's - "People are stupid. The world can go to hell. Let's stay home and watch TV."Also known as: Grumbles, Sour puss, Stick-in-the-mud, Old Fogy, Slow Mover, Advantages: Stays put; predictableDisadvantages: Royal pain in the assFlinchy - "I-I'm sorry for whatever it was I did." Also known as: Trembly, Creampuff, Hey youAdvantages: Jumps entertainingly when startledDisadvantages: Easily spooked; surrenders without a struggleBigfoot - "Shut yer trap, I'm thinkin'."Also known as: Chunk-style, Lummox, Ignoramus, Galoot, the Hulk, Big 'n' DumbAdvantages: Can tote bales; is easily fooledDisadvantages: Can break you in half, sweats like a pigLazybones - "Zzzzzz"Also known as: Lucky Dog, Parasite, Bum, Sponge, Snoozebucket, Drug AddictAdvantages: Well rested; easy targetDisadvantages: Unlikely to fulfill your dreamsThe Sneak - "Who, me?"Also known as: Love Pirate, Snake, Rat, Slime, G-D Son of a BitchAdvantages: May feel pangs of guiltDisadvantages: May be having time of his lifeAce of Hearts - "After I wash the dishes let's make love like crazed weasels, OK?"Also known as: The Sizzler, Handyman, Dreamboat, Casanova, MonsterAdvantages: Perpetually arousedDisadvantages: Perpetually arousedThe Dreamer - "Someday I'm going to be rich and famous. I don't know how,"Also known as: Struggling artist, Philosopher, Buffoon, Bag of Wind, FoolAdvantages: Tells good storiesDisadvantages: Will turn into "Old Man Grump's"Mr. Right - "While the servants wash the dishes, let's make love like crazed weasels in my new yacht, ok?"Also known as: Mr. Perfect, Jim DandyAdvantages: Answer to a woman's prayerDisadvantages: Hunted to extinction

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