"The Hunchback of Notre Dame is about to retire" joke
The Hunchback of Notre Dame is about to retire, and has been notified by his bosses that he must first find a replacement bell ringer.
He places a notice in the "Help Wanted" section of the local paper, and one day an applicant climbs the stairs to the bell tower, in search of employment.
The Hunchback cautions him on the dangers involved in the job - mainly, that of slipping and falling to one's death while bell ringing. The applicant seems unimpressed by this, and explains to the Hunchback that he comes from a long line of bell ringers, and that his family uses a special bell ringing technique.
The Hunchback, eager to see this, asks him to audition. The applicant goes up to a large bell perched high in the tower, pulls it towards him, and smashes his forehead into it to make it sound. Dazed from the impact, he stumbles and falls from the tower to his death below. The Hunchback climbs down there to find a crowd gathered and a policeman who says, "I see someone fell from your bell tower - do you know who he is?"
The Hunckback replies, "No, but his face rings a bell..."
The next day, another applicant arrives for the job. It turns out this fellow is the brother of the one who fell to his death the other day.
In like manner, he demonstrates his familial bell-ringing technique, and he, too, stumbles and falls to his death below. The Hunchback again ambles down to check out the scene, where the policeman says, "Hmmm.... another one... did you know him well?"
The Hunchback replies, "No, but he's a dead ringer for his brother..."
There was a Irishman, Mexican, and a blond guy, who were construction workers and they were working on top of a building. It was lunch time and the Irsh man opens his lunch pail and he gets cabbage and beef and he says, "If I get one more beef and cabage for lunch I'm gonna more...
President Vladimir Putin called President Bush with an emergency:
"Our largest condom factory has exploded!" the Russian President cried; "My people's favourite form of birth control! This is a true disaster!"
"Boris, the American people more...
Some important theological questions can best be answered by
thinking of God as a computer programmer:
Q: Did God really create the world in seven days?
A: He did it in six days and nights while living on cola and
candy bars. On the seventh day he went home and more...
A programmer died after leading a rather quit life. This guy was lucky, he got a choice between going to heaven or hell.
So he went on a tour of heaven with St. Peter. All around him people was singing and clapping hands or just leading a mild, peacefull existence. more...