"The Pastor's Plights" joke
It was a sunny day in the Big Apple, but a poor black preacher was having enough troubles already. His rent was due, and his little chapel was losing so many of his fellow followers, that he was about to jump out into the street when the pastor who had been "robbing" him just happened to to turn the corner.
"What's the matter with you, my brother?"
"I'm about to lose all my friends to your church and my rent is due."
"Well, not much i can do about the rent, but I can give you a little help with the patrons of yo little chapel."
"shoot fo'."
And the rich preacher pulled out a genuine 1846 gold pocketwatch, and said proudly but softly, "whenever yo audience is about to sleep, just sway this back and forth, and they'll do whatever you want."
"can i borrow dat?"
"fo' sho'."
The next week, the rich pastor checks in with the poor pastor, but he looks even more down in the dumps.
"Well? Didn't it work?"
"Hey yeah it worked."
"Then why so low?"
"Well, I tried out yo hypnosis thing, and the audience went into a trance. I said the sermon, I swayed the medallion, and told the audience to applaud. It was so thunderous, you couldn't do better in an opera house! But then, the chain snapped, and I yelled, 'SHIT!'. It'll be a miracle if we can get the chapel cleaned up!"
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