"~ Things Girls Wish Guys Knew ~" joke

1. Don't ever lie to us; we always find out.

2. We don't enjoy talking dirty to you as much as you enjoy listening.

3. Don't say you understand when you don't.

4. Girls are petty; get over it.

5. You don't have PMS; don't even act like you know what it's like.

6. If you talk about having a big one; we know you don't.

7. Size really does matter.

8. We don't like it when you *act* like Mr. Big; we like it when you *are* Mr.Big.

9. A stereo system in your car only impresses your buddies.

10. No matter what you say, your ex-girlfriend is a hoe.

11. If you did something wrong or even if you didn't, apologize.

12. We are self-conscious by nature; we can't help it.

13. Fashion police do exist.

14. We absolutely do not care about monster trucks, car systems, paintball, or anything else you and your friends talk about.

16. We don't shave our legs every day; get over it.

17. Don't make bets about us; we always find out.

18. Even is you think it is cool to burp, fart, or emit other strange gases from your body, it is not.

19. It is not cool to shoot snot rockets.

20. We will always think we are fat, so humor us and tell us we aren't.

21. You can shoot hoops, score a goal, knock down big fat guys, and hit a little baseball with a stick, so why the hell can't you piss in the toilet and not on it??

22. Most importantly: we are always right; so don't forget it.