"Things You Would Never Know Without the Movies" joke
-It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.
-A detective can only solve a case once he has been fired from his job.
-If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
-Most laptop computers are powerful enough to override the communication systems of any invading alien civilization.
-It doesn't matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involving martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked them out.
-When a person is knocked unconscious by a blow to the head, they will never suffer a concussion or brain damage.
-No one involved in a car chase, hijacking, explosion, volcanic eruption or alien invasion will ever go into shock.
-Police Departments give their officers personality tests to make sure they are deliberately assigned a partner who is their total opposite.
-When foreigners are alone, they all prefer to speak English to each other.
-You can always find a chainsaw when you need one.
-Any lock can be picked by a credit card or a paper clip in seconds, unless it's the door to a burning building with a child trapped inside.
-An electric fence, powerful enough to kill a dinosaur will cause no lasting damage to an eight-year-old child.
-Every time a person turns on the television to see the news, he instantly sees what he wants and what concerns him.
An alien walked into a shop and told the owner that he came from Mars and wanted to buy a brain for research. ''How much is this one?'' he asked. ''Well that one is a monkey brain and it's $20,'' he explained. ''How much is that one?'' he asked ''Well that one is a female brain more...
-It is always possible to park directly outside any building you are visiting.
-A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.
-If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps.
-Most laptop more...
I used to be smug about the Y2K problem even though it was definitely a problem with 100% probability of occurrence. But then I got to thinking about chaos theory and what really causes big problems and disasters. It's the little unexpected things. For example, a barge strikes a more...
Earth has finally established contact with an alien civilization. The Council of Nations has sent a group of 6 scientists (of various nationalities) to the pre-decided rendezvous point. The aliens, weird beings with antennae, arrive at about the same time.
The discussion more...