"Unengaged Brain" joke
A blonde goes into a world wide message center to send a message to her mother in Poland. The man tells her it will be $300. She exclaims, "I don't have any money, but I would do ANYTHING to get a message to my mother in Poland!!!"To that the man asks, "Anything??"And the blonde says, "Yes, anything!!"With that, the man says, "Follow me."He walks into the next room and tells her, "Come in and close the door."She does.He then says, "Get on your knees."She does.He then says, "Take down my zipper."She does.He then says, "Go ahead, take it out."With that she takes it out and takes hold of it with both hands.The man then says, "Well, go ahead!"She brings her mouth closer to it, and while holding it close to her lips, she says, "Hello...Mom?"
Normal people believe that "If it ain't broke, don't fix it." Engineers believe that "If it ain't broke, it doesn't have enough features yet"
A woman was leaving a 7-11 with her morning coffee when she noticed a most unusual funeral procession approaching the nearby cemetery. A long black hearse was followed by a second long black hearse about 50 feet behind. Behind the second hearse was a solitary woman walking a pit more...
your momas so fat when she steped on a scale the scale said o shit i want ur weight not ur fone number
A couple was invited to a swanky masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. He, being a devoted husband, protested, but she argued and said she was going to take some aspirin and go to bed, and there was no need of his good more...
A dumb blonde was really tired of being made fun of, so she decided to have her hair she would look like a brunette. When she had brown hair, she decided to take a drive in the country.
After she had been driving for a while, she saw a farmer and a flock of sheep and more...