"Use the Word..." joke

Teacher: Jimmy, use the word "handsome" in a sentence.
Jimmy: Handsome gum over will ya?
Teacher: No, no, that's not right. You have one more chance. Use the word "gladiator" in a sentence.
Jimmy: A monster ate my sister and I'm gladiator.

Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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A guy says to his friend, "I can't remember if the doctor told me my wife has AIDS or Alzheimer's."
His friend says, "It's simple. Drive her to the other side of town. If she finds her way home, don't fuck her."

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What do you call Napoleon after a bomb has hit him?
Napoleon Blown Apart

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Once Chuck Norris had a boner.
Their were no survivors

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Chuck Norris frequently donates blood to the Red Cross. Just never his own.

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