"Wonderful Groundhog Day" joke

Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I'll bet you don't know what day this is?"
"Of course I do," he answered as if he was offended, and left for
the office.
The doorbell rang at 10 a. m., and when the wife opened the door, she was handed a box of a dozen long stemmed red roses. At 1: 00 p. m., a foil-wrapped, two-pound box of her favorite chocolates was delivered.

Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.
"First the flowers, then the chocolates and then the dress!" she exclaimed.
"I've never had a more wonderful Groundhog Day in my life!"

While the pope was visiting the USA, he told the driver of his limo that he has the sudden urge to drive. The driver was a good Catholic man, and would not ever dream of questioning the pope's authority. So the pope sat at the wheel, while his driver got in the back. They were more...

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yo mama cooks so bad they pray after they eat!

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What is the definition of eternity?
Four blondes in four cars at a four way intersection.

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Why is santa claus always so happy?
He knows where all of the bad girls live!

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This is a bricklayer's accident report that was printed in the newsletter of the English equivalent of the Workers' Compensation Board. So here, thanks to John Sedgwick, is this Bricklayer's report. Dear Sir; I am writing in response to your request for additional information in more...

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