lip Jokes / Recent Jokes
According to a radio report, a middle school in Oregon was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the restroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick, they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done. She called all of the girls to the restroom and met them there with the maintenance man. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every night. To demonstrate how! difficult it was to clean the mirrors, she asked the maintenance guy to clean one of them. He took a long handled squeegee, dipped it into the toilet and then cleaned the mirror. Since then, there have been no lip prints on the mirrors.
According to a radio report, a middle school in Oregon was faced with a unique problem. A number of girls were beginning to use lipstick and would put it on in the bathroom. That was fine, but after they put on their lipstick they would press their lips to the mirror leaving dozens of little lip prints. Finally the principal decided that something had to be done.
She called all the girls to the bathroom and met them there with the custodian. She explained that all these lip prints were causing a major problem for the custodian who had to clean the mirrors every day.
To demonstrate how difficult it was to clean the mirrors. She asked the custodian to clean one of the mirrors. He took out a long-handled squeegee, dipped it into the toilet, and then cleaned the mirror.
Since then there have been no lip prints on the mirror.
Whats three things you can't give to a black guy?
A black eye
A fat lip
And a job
WHEN Shabana Azmi greeted Nelson Mandela with a kiss, the following eulogy was written in praise of the act by Principal B. S. Bhatnagar of the Indian school at Al Ghubra, Sultanate of Oman:
A kiss is that which you cannot give without taking, and cannot take without giving.
It is a contraction of the mouth due to an enlargement of the heart. It is a course of procedure cunningly devised for the mutual stoppage of speech at a moment when words are superfluous.
It is lip service to love and the anatomical juxtaposition of two orbicularis oris muscles in a state of contraction. A kiss is a peculiar proposition.
Of no use to one, yet absolute bliss to two. The small boy gets it for nothing, the young man has to steal it, and the old man has to buy it. It is the baby's right, the lover's privilege, and the hypocrite's mask.
To a young girl, faith? A married woman - hope? To an old maid - charity. A kiss can be a comma, a quotation mark or an exclamation point. It more...
Q: What does a blonde put behind her ears to make her more attractive?
A: Her ankles.
Q: What do you say to a Blonde that won't give in?
A: "Have another beer."
Q: What do Blondes say after sex?
A1: Thanks Guys.
A2: Are you boys all in the same band?
A3: Do you guys all play for the Green Bay Packers?
Q: How do you make a blonde's eyes twinkle?
A: Shine a flashlight in their ear.
Q: What does a screen door and a blonde have in common?
A: The more you bang it the looser it gets.
Q: What does a blond and a beer bottle have in common?
A: They're both empty from the neck up.
Q: What do blonds and spaghetti have in common?
A: They both wriggle when you eat them.
Q: Why was the blondes' belly button sore?
A: Because her boyfriend was blonde too.
Q: How do you get a blond out of a tree?
A: Wave
Q: What do peroxide blonds and black men have in common?
A: They both have black more...
Q: Why are there lip stick stains on the steering wheel after a blonde drives a car?
A: Because she blows the horn!