21st Jokes

T-shirt in the 21st century - "Disco still sucks"

Joey had heard a family rumor that his father, his grand-father and even his great-grandfather, all "walked on water" on their 21st birthday. Well today was his 21st birthday and if they could do it, so could he.
So, off he went in a boat with his friend Eric. When he got out in the middle of the lake, he got up and stepped out of the boat....and damn near drowned.
The next day, Joey asked his grandmother why he wasn't given the same gift as the others in his family. The grandmother told him that his father, grand-father and great-grandfather had all been born in February...not in August as was he.

21ST CENTURY IS TRULY LIFELESS
COMMUNICATION -- WIRELESS
COOKING -- FIRELESS
YOUTH -- JOBLESS
FOOD -- FATLESS
THIS MESSAGE -- MEANINGLESS
SENDER -- PRICELESS
READER -- USELESS

From former chairman of the US Federal Reserve Paul Volcker according
to the Wall Street Journal:
A parrot fancier who happened into a London pet shop noticed a
particularly colorful bird and asked its price.
"Five thousand pounds," the shop owner replied.
"Five thousand pounds?" the man asked. "Why so much?"
"Well, this bird speaks fluent Italian, Spanish and French, is
brushing up on his German and starting to study English," came the
reply. "With the European Community's unification due in 1992, he'll
be a great asset."
"I don't care about the Common Market," the parrot fancier said.
"What about that gray one in that other cage?"
The gray one was 15,000 pounds, he was told, because the bird spoke
Arabic, Chinese, and Korean and was learning Japanese-"the
languages of the 21st century."
"I'm too old to worry about the 21st century," more...

All of his life Stosh had heard stories of an amazing family tradition. It seems that his father, grandfather and great-grandfather had all been able to walk on water on their 21st birthday. On that day, they'd walk across the lake to the boat club for their first legal drink.
So when Stosh's 21st birthday came around, he and his pal Stan took a boat out to the middle of the lake. Stosh stepped out of the boat and nearly drowned! Stan just managed to pull him to safety.
Furious and confused, Stosh went to see his grandmother. "Grandma, it's my 21st birthday, so why can't I walk across the lake like my father, his father, and his father before him?"
Granny looked into Stosh's eyes and said, "Because, you dumb ass, your father, grandfather and great grandfather were born in January, but you were born in July."