Adorable Jokes / Recent Jokes
After being away on business for a couple of months, a salesman was finally on his way home. Feeling bad about having been away from his children for such a lengthy time, he stopped by a pet store and bought them an adorable little puppy.
Unfortunately, as he was about to board his flight, he was stopped by a flight attendant who told him that they did not allow animals.
In desperation, the man rushed to the men's room and stuffed the puppy down the front of his pants. He put on his overcoat to cover up and then boarded the plane.
When the flight attendant was making her rounds about an hour after take-off, she noticed the salesman looking very pale and fidgeting around in his seat. She asked if he was all right and he told her that he was just feeling a little airsick.
A few minutes later, she noticed that he was now sweating and squirming frantically in his seat. She approached him again and asked him if he was sure he was all right.
"Well, actually," more...
One Halloween this woman opens her door to find the most adorable little girl, with golden blond curly hair and the biggest blue eyes.
She was dressed as an Angel, and was just delightful. The woman said, "what are you supposed to say sweetheart?"
The little girl looks up at the woman and says "Twick or Tweat!"
The woman thinks this is just adorable, and she calls her husband to come to the door. The woman say to the child, "Go ahead honey say it just one more time."
Once again the little Angel looks up and says, "Twick or Tweat!"
The husband agrees with his wife, this little Angel is just the cutest thing. The woman picks an apple from the Treat Bowl, shines it up with her apron, and drops it into the little girl's Treat Bag.
The little Angel looks in her bag then looks up at the woman and says, "Thanks a lot lady, you just broke my fucking cookies!"
Little Bruce and Jenny are only 10 years old, but they just know that they are in love. One day they decide that they want to get married, so Bruce goes to Jenny's father to ask him for her hand.
Bruce bravely walks up to him and says "Mr. Smith, me and Jenny are in love and I want to ask you for her hand in marriage."
Thinking that this was just the cutest thing, Mr. Smith replies, "Well Bruce, you are only 10. Where will you two live?"
Without even taking a moment to think about it, Bruce replies "In Jenny's room. It's bigger than mine and we can both fit there nicely."
Still thinking this is just adorable, Mr. Smith says with a huge grin, "Okay then how will you live? You're not old enough to get a job. You'll need to support Jenny."
Again, Bruce instantly replies, "Our allowance. . Jenny makes 5 bucks a week and I make 10 bucks a week That's about 60 bucks a Month and that should do more...